THE 10 MOST COMMON CAUSES OF DIVORCE - GEOGRAFÍA - 2025

The most common causes of divorce are lack of commitment, excessive arguing, unrealistic expectations, lack of equality in the relationship, abuse, financial problems, or lack of problem-solving skills.

Divorce is a growing phenomenon that is increasingly present in our society. In fact, in recent years there has been both a gradual decline in marriages and an increase in divorces.

Different studies show how separations and divorces have increased by around 25% during the last five years. Likewise, the data provided from the United States show how between 40 and 60% of marriages end in divorce.

These data show that romantic relationships are highly complex. In addition, it is revealed that it is increasingly difficult to maintain marriages and avoid divorces. Why does this happen? What is the reason for this trend that has been experienced in recent years? What factors cause the separations?

All these questions are acquiring a high relevance in the study of conjugal relations. For this reason, we are increasingly finding more research and more data that try to answer the reasons for separation.

Most common causes of divorce

1- Lack of commitment

Lack of commitment is the factor that has been most prevalent among divorces and separations. Specifically, a recent study conducted in Utah City showed that 73% of people who had divorced cited lack of commitment as the main cause.

If we analyze the characteristics of couple relationships and marriages, it is evident that commitment is an indispensable aspect. Without the will to commit, it is highly difficult to maintain any type of relationship, much less a conjugal one.

Thus, it is observed that many couples decide to marry without being sufficiently committed. This fact almost automatically translates into divorce in subsequent years.

Today there is a high consensus in cataloging the lack of commitment as the main cause of divorce. In this way, it becomes clear how attitudes are more relevant than isolated behaviors in maintaining a marriage.

2- Excess of discussions

The second cause that has been associated with marital breakdowns is excessive arguing. The data indicate that this factor is notably lower than the lack of commitment but higher than the rest.

Specifically, the study discussed above revealed how 56% of divorce cases argue that excessive arguments were the cause of the separation.

Likewise, Dr. William H. Doherty comments that when arguments predominate within a conjugal relationship, the chances of divorce increase very high. If we analyze this factor, we can see that excessive arguing can be more of a symptom than a cause in itself.

That is, the fact that a married couple is constantly arguing can be a sign that something is not working properly. In fact, there are many experts who make this type of interpretation on this factor.

In this way, excessive discussions can reveal other types of problems such as lack of coordination, poor communication, inability to solve problems or different interests within the couple.

It is clear that arguments are one of the most delicate aspects of marriage. This is not to say that for a marriage to work you should never argue.

Discussions are considered normal and necessary in many cases. However, these must be productive and controlled. When the couple loses control over the arguments, the probability of divorce becomes very high.

3- Infidelity

This is probably the factor that people most associate with divorces and separations. For many people, these behaviors are the most unacceptable within the couple and the ones that can most easily motivate a breakup.

However, despite the fact that this view is widespread in today's society, the data shows how, in practice, infidelity falls to the third position on the list of causes for divorce.

Most studies point out how this factor can motivate between 50 and 55% of all divorce cases. Thus, despite not being the main cause, its incidence is very relevant.

However, the study of this cause presents a series of discrepancies. First of all, a study showed that 90% of the American population claimed that infidelity is a morally inadmissible act. Therefore, the attitude of society on this phenomenon seems to be quite clear.

Infidelity can lead to more than half of divorces. However, only 2% of the American population claimed to have been unfaithful to their partner. This fact shows that infidelity is more of an individual behavior than a couple, so it is subject to highly uncontrollable variables.

4- marry too young

Today there is a high consensus in affirming that marriage constitutes a complex type of relationship. Marrying too young has been shown to be a risk factor for divorce.

The data show that in 46% of the separations this fact is indicated as one of the main causes. Thus, early marriages are more likely to fail.

The fact that getting married too young is one of the main causes of divorce lies in the conditions on which the relationship is established; couples who are not well established and consolidated before marriage may not be sufficiently prepared for marriage.

Many experts relate this factor to the level of commitment and attitudes towards marriage. Marriages "precipitated" or made early in the relationship may have fewer options for developing a successful commitment.

In the same way, young people are more likely to not present the personal maturity necessary to commit to marriage and to be constant in their relationship.

5- Unrealistic expectations

Marriage represents a remarkable change in people's lives, since it implies a change in lifestyle. As it happens with any life change, personal expectations about the new situation are highly relevant.

To be able to adapt well to a new situation, it is necessary that what is expected has a certain relationship with what is witnessed. Otherwise, a greater adaptive effort and a modification of expectations will be necessary.

When this does not happen, it is often very difficult to accept and be comfortable with the change that has occurred. This situation is clearly reflected in divorces, which is why having unrealistic expectations is postulated as a major cause of divorce.

In the Utah study, 45% of divorce cases posited this factor as a major cause of separation.

Thus, having idyllic and overrated expectations about life in marriage can put the relationship in question. In these cases, if the spouses cannot adapt their expectations to their behavior and to the functioning of the couple, the marriage may fail.

6- Lack of equality in the relationship

The establishment of roles and roles is one of the main factors that determines the quality of personal relationships. In the case of couples and, above all, marriages, this element must have certain characteristics.

Regardless of the many other variables that may be important in each case, equality is usually a common element in most marriages. Establishing an unequal marriage, in which one spouse plays a more important role than the other in the relationship, is usually a negative factor.

The conception of marriage has changed notably in recent years. Relationships in which one of the members plays a dominant role and the other a submissive role constitutes a currently poorly approved conceptualization.

This fact is evident in the data on the causes of divorce. In 44% of the cases, the lack of equality in the relationship is postulated as the cause of the separation.

7- Inability to resolve conflicts

Believing that for a romantic relationship to work, there must be or conflict is usually a misconception. The study of personal relationships has shown that the appearance of conflicts between two or more individuals is a practically inevitable fact.

Being able to agree on everything is an idyllic but often unattainable situation. In this sense, the ability to resolve conflicts as a couple stands as a factor that is practically as important as avoiding discrepancies.

Thus, the key to every couple is to develop ground rules so that each member of the couple feels respected and heard. In many cases, this can be accomplished through the relationship's own mechanisms.

In cases where this does not happen, it is important to incorporate a third element. Couples therapy can be a very useful tool to learn to resolve conflicts and develop the necessary skills to manage difficult situations.

If these problems are not remedied, arguments can gradually escalate and the risk of separation can increase.

8- abuse

Marriage abuse requires special consideration; there are behaviors that are clearly outside the moral limits of marriage. Everyone has the right to be physically, emotionally and sexually safe within marriage and any other type of personal relationship.

This includes both adults and children, and both spouses and children. It is not the objective of this article to examine the characteristics of this type of behavior, but it is to reveal its relationship with divorces.

Unfortunately, abuse is a relatively common phenomenon in marriages today. This is shown by the data that show how 29% of divorces could be caused by this factor.

These data shown by the Utah national study are too high and expose a clear social problem and a significant difficulty in current marital relationships.

9- Lack of individual identity

The intimacy and proximity of marital relationships can cause a loss of individual identity. The connection and over-involvement in the couple can cause the development of a common identity that destroys the identity of each of the individuals.

This fact can occur to a greater or lesser extent and can affect the relationship to different degrees. However, in some cases the loss of individual identity can have a negative impact on the couple and cause conflicts. Thus, this factor can sometimes increase the probability of divorce.

On the other side of the coin, we find another situation that can also negatively affect marriage. This situation deals with the development of significant discrepancies in the priorities and individual interests of each of the spouses.

In these cases, having very distant needs and preferences can break the stability of the relationship and put it in question. In fact, many couples therapists place particular emphasis on the importance of maintaining common attitudes and priorities for the proper functioning of marital relationships.

10- Economic problems

Marriages rarely fail due to lack of money or financial difficulties. However, the lack of compatibility between spouses in the financial field tends to be a much more important problem.

In this sense, a marriage in which the members have opposite standards of living may present greater difficulties to function properly.

In fact, if a marriage with these characteristics does not manage to adequately manage its differences, over time the conflict can reach such heights that divorce seems to be the most logical solution.

References

1. Johnson, CA, Stanley, SM, Glenn, ND, Amato, PA, Nock, SL, Markman, HJ, & Dion, MR (2002). Marriage in Oklahoma: 2001 baseline statewide survey on marriage and divorce (S02096OKDHS). Oklahoma City, OK: Oklahoma Department of Human Services.
2. Marriage in Utah: 2003 Baseline Statewide Survey on Marriage and Divorce. (2003). p. twenty-one.
3. Paul James Birch, Stan E. Weed, & Joseph Olsen. (2004). Assessing the impact of community marriage policies on county divorce rates. Family Relations, 53, 495–503.
4. Rose M. Kreider & Jason M. Fields. (2000). Number, timing, and duration of marriages and divorces: Fall 1996. Current Population Reports, P70-80. Washington DC: US ​​Census Bureau.
5. S. Census Bureau, Statistical Abstract of the United States. (2002). Vital Statistics: Section 2. No. 111. Marriages and Divorces-Number and Rate by State: 1990 to 2001.