HOW TO BE A GENTLEMAN: TIPS THAT WORK - GEOGRAFÍA - 2024

Do you want to learn to be more gentlemanly? Surely you have heard that they are an endangered species and, even if you decide to opt to be one, the truth is that their set-up requires many small details that may still escape you.

But do not despair. With patience, observation and dedication, it is possible to acquire the skills that a man needs to change from being a normal person to being someone distinguished and refined.

Throughout this article we will explain how to be a gentleman and we will give you several tips to treat both family, couples and co-workers. You have to be clear that this is not a seduction guide, but a lifestyle that applies to all areas of your environment and that is intended to be able to find yourself comfortable with yourself and feel valued by others.

In any case, if your goal is to achieve the loving affection of another person, following some of the guidelines that we will mark here may also help you. The reasons you will discover as you read the post.

To make understanding more enjoyable, we will divide a gentleman's behavior patterns into 4 sections (with their corresponding subsections) that include: image care, education and respect, couple and family relationships.

Important steps to be a gentleman

Take care of your body image

It sounds very superficial, but the truth is that both men and women the first thing they do when meeting another person is to look at the physical. The first eye contact can provoke the appreciation or rejection of another individual, pigeonholeing you and quite possibly creating prejudices about your identity.

Maintain proper hygiene

There is much discrepancy within the scientific community when assessing whether body odor affects, to a greater or lesser extent, the impression that a person can make.

In 2014, the University of Berkeley (USA) published an article in the Journal of Neuroscience in which it defended that the smell of men's sweat stimulated female sex hormones.

To do this, the experts measured the levels of the hormone cortisol in 48 women (with an average age of 21 years) who smelled a chemical that was based on male odor. The result? Increased brain activation, sexual arousal and mood in just 15 minutes.

It should be noted that this study was limited to investigating heterosexual women, with both homosexual women and men being excluded for "fear that they would not react the same to the chemical component."

Does this mean that a male should give up showering and deodorant? Hygiene is not at all key to creating a great impression on any girl, boy or potential future boss.

Groom all parts of your body routinely, take care of your hair and avoid keeping it dirty or sticky, use deodorants or products that help to improve excessive sweating, or keep your hands always clean.

So why do we cite the body odor study? Because it is not about "disinfecting" or maintaining a perfect neatness, but to clean yourself without exaggeration. A gentleman stands out for creating the extraordinary in simple. Surely with more later examples you will understand the idea.

Healthy hair and proper haircut

Being clean is not everything. A gentleman should always maintain an image of his body as pristine as possible.

Starting with a correct hairstyle. Show yourself in front of a mirror and see if you feel better with short or long hair. Be fair to yourself and try to make the most of what nature gave you up there. Long hair like actor Bradley Cooper or practically shaved hair like athlete Fabio Cannavaro will not suit all of us.

The aim is that you opt for a flattering hairstyle that is not very extravagant. Remember that fashions are fleeting and quite possibly leave a ridiculous mark with the weight of time. The secret is to always keep it neat and sharp. To do this, use shampoos according to your hair and avoid excess gel or hairspray.

It is recommended that, if for example you usually wear short hair, you trim it every two or three weeks to always keep it at the same level. More time exposed to free will creates a feeling of laziness.

Finally, if you are prone to dandruff developing in your hair, eliminate it radically with special shampoos for it or with natural remedies recommended by specialists. There is nothing more uncomfortable than having your jacket or shirt full of dandruff.

If you suffer from alopecia do not despair, not having hair does not mean that you are excluded to be a gentleman. In fact, a study developed at the University of Pennsylvania (USA), ensures that bald people are perceived as dominant, strong and with the charisma of a leader.

Like the example above, try to keep whatever scalp you do keep on the same level or be bolder and scrape to zero. Coach Pep Guardiola can be a good example to look at.

Always clean teeth

Closely linked to the previous section on hygiene, but where we emphasize due to its importance.

There are many people who first look at the other person's teeth, most of the time unconsciously.

The reason is an anthropological phenomenon in which, as happens with horses, strong white teeth are associated with health. So the more rights and clean we have them the better.

Along with the teeth, take care of the breath in your mouth through the necessary means. Halitosis, in addition to the bacteria it produces, again creates a feeling of neglect in the environment.

Perfect hands

As with dentures, the hands are usually another of the most visual body parts for people. Keeping them clean, with well-defined nails and if possible with special creams that keep them soft, are a plus when it comes to being perceived as a careful person.

If you carry out a very mechanical job that damages your hands or nails a lot, you should try to put more emphasis not only for a matter of image, but also for health so that they reach a certain age without looking old.

Others

We could focus on each of the parts of the human anatomy, but we will summarize some in this section:

• Outline the hairs that appear on your nose and ear.
• Use eye drops or other allergens to remove redness from your eyes, something that can be associated with problems with narcotics.
• Waxing yes or no? Be yourself, but if you opt for waxing make sure to maintain regular care.
• As with your hands, both your feet and your nails should look good.
• Genital hygiene is very important both in your sexual life and when it comes to keeping bacteria outbreaks.

Dress presentably

Point at least controversial. It is important to have your own style and with which you feel comfortable with yourself, but we bet more to know how to adapt to what the situation requires.

You are not going to stop being a gentleman by dressing in a style linked to heavy metal, but if you go to a job interview or a wedding in your rags, it is most likely that you are out of tune and create a feeling of little empathy in your environment.

The ideal is to bet on a wardrobe in which you combine your style with simple things. Sobriety can always be linked to more painting details if you have the taste to combine it.

For example, if you consider yourself “hippie” and you hate going to weddings because you wear warmer clothes such as an elegant suit jacket, put on the suit and add a personal detail such as a flower pocket square or somewhat more quirky cufflinks. Keep your style, but also your distinction.

Ultimately, it is not about you being a lord, but about maintaining codes according to the context. What you should be clear about, whatever wardrobe you have, is meticulousness when it comes to taking care of your clothes. Ironed shirts, clean shoes or accessories without defects.

Manage your non-verbal communication

Gestures, looks, expressions or fuss are part of non-verbal communication. A very important channel of information that we rarely stop to analyze and develop in an enriching way.

Starting with the greeting. When you squeeze the hand of another man you have just met, do so firmly and looking at the face of your interlocutor. Of course, do not press too hard or challenge with your eyes, because you will achieve the opposite effect to what you want to obtain. Rudeness and boasting of masculinity are totally forbidden in anyone who aspires to be a gentleman.

As for the greeting with them, the situation will depend on the moment. In hot countries like Spain or Latin America it is normal to kiss them on both sides of the cheek, being something closer. However, if you have a job interview in which it is a woman who will evaluate you, the affections are put aside and the business protocol is followed, where the handshake is more usual.

The look is essential too, being the most expressive part of our body. Normally, men do not hold their gaze as much as women for sociological reasons, something that must be corrected to show that you pay attention. As with the greeting, avoid staring too long as it will create a feeling of challenge.

The hands are another source of information that can reveal much of our attitudes. Avoid being too expressive with her, making thousands of fuss, because you will show yourself to be a nervous or aggressive person, being very inelegant.

The physical contact should be just enough to not embarrass your partner / a, avoiding talking about slapping or grabbing your face or shoulder. Always keep a space where you respect their living space.

Some of the other gestures to avoid are:

• Continuously look at the watch or mobile, as it indicates disinterest in the other.
• Smile falsely. They are easy to catch and you will create a very bad feeling.
• Touching the collar of your shirt or tie. You radiate discomfort from here to Peking.
• Don't inspect your nails.
• Don't narrow your eyes or stroke your chin. Your interlocutor will be uncomfortable with your way of judging him.
• Don't look down in a group conversation as you seem out of place.
• Don't put your hands behind your head unless you want to indicate superiority.
• Crossing arms. Selfishness, closed posture, resistance.

Be polite and respectful

We put aside what is related to the physical and the image and we delve into deeper and more valuable issues such as education, respect or values, something that they must carry to the letter at all times and with everyone. It is useless to worship the body if you do not know how to handle situations with your mind.

Puntuality

We will start with something basic and that however is not usually fulfilled in today's society. It is very irritating that they play with something as valuable as your time. It is important that you be at the agreed time and that, if at any given moment you cannot be punctual, have the chivalry to notify other people in advance.

Punctuality says a lot about a person and what they can bring you in life or work.

Show interest in others

A person with education and a certain culture will always have a somewhat more refined taste for dealing with certain subjects or carrying out certain tasks. It is not necessary to be an enlightened person or have a higher degree in possession, but to show interest in current affairs, politics, history of your city or country. Reading books and traveling will help you have more talking points.

A person who has an interesting conversation is able to support his physique (whether graceful or not), thereby creating a closer and more attractive affinity with his environment.

It is necessary to note that, even if you are a cultured person or pretend to be, you should also know when to stop, since you will create a pedantic profile with which you will scare anyone. Everything in its proper measure, avoiding talking too much about yourself and everything you know.

Learn to listen

This is a good way to mitigate your potential "cooltureta" outbursts. Opening your ears well will benefit you a lot because you will know more about others and their behavior. They will find that empathy they seek and you will learn to be patient.

Asking how the day went, knowing how to accept no for an answer or being interested in their concerns are some examples to understand this section.

Behave at a social event

Whether at a work dinner, a date, a birthday, a farewell or a game between soccer friends. Always maintain your composure and contribute everything you can to make everything go great.

Always avoid going badly (in those cases make an excuse and do not attend), contribute by bringing some detail, maintain table manners, chat in a relaxed manner, try to attend all the attendees, show interest in someone who may feel displaced by being new to the group, etc.

Be considerate of minorities

Many times it is likely that you go to certain places where people are who cannot find their place or are not completely comfortable. Try to make them feel as comfortable as possible and thus make the ordeal more enjoyable.

An example would be keeping an eye on an older person attending a wedding. Possibly that lady may not be entirely comfortable because there is a lot of noise or she cannot get up to refill her drink.

Show appreciation and accompany her to a place further away from the noise or serve her drink when you see her glass is empty.

Couple relationships

The best advice we could give you is to follow the maxim of "treat others as you would like to be treated". A gentleman must be aware that when dealing with another person a bond can be created in which feelings come into play and therefore everything acquires a more delicate nuance.

Be honest with your appointments

We all want to make a good impression on our first meeting with another person, especially if we have a predisposition that goes beyond simple friendship. This sometimes causes us to create masks full of lies or misrepresented stories to impact the other person more.

However, that only contributes to your going from being an interesting guy to being a liar over time. You will not be better or worse for who you are or have lived, if he or she is really interested in you, he or she will want to have more dates being just who you are.

Show courtesy

For a relationship to flow, you need to be kind and care about your date or partner. In addition to inviting her to carry out certain plans, offer to pick her up, accompany her back home, or give her a little gift. Don't fall for paternalism, just be polite.

Don't force the situation

Relationships have to flow little by little. Each person is a world and what for you has a rhythm, for him / her has another.

If you want something a lot, let it be known and try to strike an agreement that satisfies both of you. Trust should be an important point in any relationship worth its salt.

Family

In general, the family you grew up with and the family you have or will form will be the most valuable thing you have in your life. For a gentleman, putting it before anything should be something that did not even consider.

Keep in touch with your parents

If you are independent or you already live with your wife, never forget those who took care of you and were with you since you were little. They are responsible for who you are today and it is something for which you should always be grateful.

Call them on the phone periodically, ask them if they need anything, visit them and bring them a gift or invite them to dinner every now and then. Each one already leads his life, but that is not a reason for you to lose contact with them.

Support your partner and children

A gentleman must always be a link for his wife and children, being responsible for supporting each of the decisions they make.

Of course, never abandon your family because of a bad streak. When things get complicated we tend to think that we no longer want to be in that circle, but the reality is that this tension clouds the fact that you do love those people.

You must be a pillar of the commitment you made when you kissed your wife for the first time.

Taking over household chores

Although it sounds obvious, the truth is that in the XXI century this does not happen like that. To this day, women are still the ones who take over the housework in a greater proportion.

A gentleman of this time should not acquire the role of collaborator, but be a first-hand participant in each and every one of the tasks of a house. For this, it is necessary to establish equitable coexistence rules, in which each one contributes to carrying out the nest of love.

Therefore, if I gave you any specific advice on what to do or not do in this situation, we would only contribute to promoting domestic machismo. As a gentleman you aspire to be, apply yourself and feel fulfilled.

Much has been written about how to be a gentleman and more will continue to be written over time. Obviously, different cultures have a very different pattern of gentleman than the one I write about and for some people our description of the modern gentleman prototype may dislike you.

For this reason, we would like to know what are the requirements that a person who aspires to be honest, noble, gallant, educated and courteous, that is, a gentleman, should fulfill for you.