THE 4 EDUCATIONAL PARENTING STYLES AND THEIR CHARACTERISTICS - ECONOMÍA - 2025

The styles of parenting education refer to the set of behaviors of parents with their children to inculcate cultural norms and values. There are parents who are more or less demanding, and this will make the children have to work more or less to achieve the objectives.

There are also fathers and mothers who establish a wide variety of rules, very inflexible and with demanding punishments if they are not complied with, just as there are those who if they put punishments at the end they do not carry them into practice, and who do not directly use punishment as a method educational.

As expected, these dimensions are not only governed by their extremes (not at all affective-very affective, not at all demanding-very demanding), but they are organized in a continuous line with many degrees and nuances.

Dimensions of the behavior of fathers and mothers

When we analyze the basic dimensions of the behavior of fathers and mothers, we find two main ones:

Affection and communication

It is the importance that parents give to love and affection in their relationship with their children. The emotional tone that directs the interactions between fathers, mothers and children, as well as the level of communicative exchanges existing in these interactions.

There are fathers and mothers who maintain a warm and close relationship with their children, which motivate them to express their emotions and thoughts. However, there are also parents whose relationship with their children is more cold. There are fewer communicative exchanges with their children, fewer expressions of affection and sometimes hostility rules.

Control and demands

It consists primarily of discipline. How much parents demand of their children, to what extent they control their behavior, whether there are punishments or not… and how they approach situations that pose challenges for their children.

The 4 parental educational styles

The dimensions we mentioned earlier are the basis of the four typical parenting styles of fathers and mothers towards their children. Next, we present a summary table of the four educational styles depending on the combination between the levels of the basic dimensions.

1-The democratic style

It is the one followed by parents who maintain explicit displays of affection and acceptance, show sensitivity to the needs of their children, encourage them to express themselves verbally by externalizing their feelings and thoughts.

They also have a high level of demand that seeks effort on the part of their children, they leave the rules clear by letting their children know them, and they comply with the punishments or sanctions.

Their relationship with their children is characterized by being warm, close, affectionate and communicative. They tend to have explanatory dialogues with their children based on reasoning and coherence. They use positive reinforcement, and they encourage their children to continually improve themselves.

This educational style is the most sought after and recommended in general, since its positive effects on the mental health of children have been demonstrated.

Children of Democratic Parents

These children are the ones with the characteristics generally most desired by today's Western culture. They are characterized by having a high self-esteem, with confidence in themselves, who strive to achieve their goals and do not give up easily. They face new situations with confidence and enthusiasm.

They have good social skills, so they are socially competent, and they have great emotional intelligence, which allows them to express, understand and control their own emotions, as well as understand those of others and have empathy.

2-The authoritarian style

Parents who follow this educational style place great importance on rules, control and demands, but emotions and affections do not play a leading role in their interactions with their children.

They do not tend to openly express affection towards their children, and they are not very sensitive to the needs presented by their children (especially needs for love, affection and emotional support).

Sometimes they have a great need for control over their children, which they express as a reaffirmation of power over them, without explanation. They do not give importance to children understanding why they have to do what is asked of them, so that the rules are not explained reasonably, they are imposed.

Phrases such as "because I said so", "because I am your father / mother" or "this is my house and you will do what I tell you" are typical of authoritarian parents.

They tend to use punishment and threats as a way to shape the behavior of their children, which they strictly comply with.

Children of authoritarian parents

These children tend to have low self-esteem, since their parents have not taken into account their emotional and affective needs to the same level as the norms. They have learned that power and external demands are a priority, and that is why they are obedient and submissive to external powers.

However, they are insecure children with low emotional intelligence, who hardly have self-control over their emotions or behaviors when an external source of control is absent. For this reason, they are vulnerable to presenting aggressive behaviors in situations whose self-control only depends on themselves.

In addition, they are not very skilled in social relationships, since they do not understand the emotions and behaviors of others, and insecurity rules in them.

3-The permissive style

Contrary to what happens in the authoritarian style, the permissive style is characterized by high affective and emotional levels. These parents prioritize the well-being of their child over anything and everything, and it is the interests and wishes of the child that govern the parent-child relationship.

Consequently, they are undemanding parents, posing few rules and challenges for their children. Given the difficulty, they will allow their children to give up easily, and they will tend not to comply with the punishments and threats that they put on their children (if they use them).

Children of permissive parents

These children are characterized by being very cheerful, funny and expressive. However, unaccustomed to the rules, limits, demands and effort, they are also very immature children, unable to control their impulses and who give up easily.

In addition, they tend to be quite selfish children, since they have always prioritized them above everything else, and they have not had to give up things for others.

4-The indifferent / negligent style

We could classify this last educational style as non-existent. Indeed, parents pay little attention to their children in both dimensions, so that norms and affections are conspicuous by their absence.

Their relationships with their children are cold and distant, with little sensitivity in relation to the needs of the little ones, sometimes forgetting even the basic needs (food, hygiene and care).

In addition, although they generally do not set limits and norms, they sometimes exercise excessive and unjustified control, totally incoherent, which only makes children dizzy about their own behavior and emotions.

Children of indifferent / neglectful parents

These children have identity problems and low self-esteem. They do not know the importance of the rules, and, therefore, they will hardly comply with them. In addition, they are not very sensitive to the needs of others and especially vulnerable to presenting behavioral problems, with the personal and social conflicts that this entails.

Educate in the family

When we talk about educating in the family, we refer to the process that parents do with their children when it comes to helping them develop their intellectual, moral, emotional and affective faculties.

All these faculties are essential for the development of children, although in the society of academic degrees in which we find ourselves, cognitive development seems to be prioritized above all else.

The truth is that emotional development is one of the essential elements in people, which helps to understand the world and the personality. Emotional intelligence allows us to express emotions, understand and control them, as well as understand the emotions of others.

This is not to say that norms and cognitive development are not important, but it does mean that good emotional development accompanies optimal cognitive development. Both aspects feed into each other, and should be taken into account when educating children.

Development of personality and emotions

The development of the personality and the emotions of the children depend to a great extent on the educational and socialization processes. Her self-esteem is largely linked to how she feels valued by her parents, and learning about emotions will be linked to the socialization and affective processes that occur within her family.

In the earliest ages of children, their family has a great weight in these processes, since children are still domocentric, that is, their parents and siblings, if they have them, are the center of their life and above all. that base their reality.

Furthermore, the influences that children and their families receive are multidirectional. For example, the relationship between the parents will affect their child, or the child's temperament will affect the parents. Also the relationship between siblings, or each child with each parent, will have an impact on the family nucleus: Everything counts.

For this reason, we must understand the family as a system of reciprocal interpersonal relationships, which is not isolated from the environment that surrounds it or alien to its influences: The work of parents, the experiences that children live in school, parents' relationship with the school, etc. They are also important in the development of the nuclear family and of the family as a system.

In any case, the education that parents provide to their children is key to their development, as it will be the one that tells them how to relate to the world, what things are important, or how much they should love themselves.

References

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