WHAT IS A PERMISSIVE FAMILY LIKE? CHARACTERISTICS AND CONSEQUENCES - ECONOMÍA - 2024

A permissive family is one that is characterized by being overprotective, undemanding and extremely doomed to fulfill each and every one of the children's wishes. Generally, permissive parents have difficulties denying things to their children, either out of fear of losing their love, or because they consider becoming a benchmark for discipline negative.

These permissive attitudes tend to create difficulties for children in their adult lives. In some cases they can develop weak personalities, with little disposition to recognize their own faults and with conflicting manifestations in relation to their surroundings.

However, not all the characteristics of permissive families are negative. Some scholars have rescued as a positive element, for example, the fact of giving importance to the concerns of children, and also establish that children can feel capable if they feel the confidence of being able to fulfill their objectives.

Likewise, the importance of complementing this generation of self-confidence with the understanding that it is natural that there are inaccessible objectives, and that the fact of living in society implies that one must learn to live with other people with different ways of thinking.

Characteristics of permissive families

They yield to everything

The parents of a permissive family tend to accommodate all the demands of their children, regardless of whether it is convenient or not to comply with those wishes.

In many cases, the motivation to please the children comes as a consequence of avoiding conflictive or uncomfortable situations, or of wanting to create an absolutely protected space.

They do not demand responsibilities

Permissive parents do not assign any kind of responsibility to their children. This absence of responsibilities includes both the personal and family sphere.

Then, the children assume that they have no obligations to any scenario or to other people, because they have never had the need to comply with commitments imposed by their protectors.

They justify bad behavior

When children act rudely, react rudely, or act arrogantly, permissive parents tend to justify such attitudes.

Permissive parents can justify such behaviors by arguing any excuse, which can range from the child's temporary mood to acknowledging that they had specific reasons for the misconduct manifested.

They do not exercise discipline

Permissive parents do not want to be seen by their children as authority figures. Therefore, they do not discipline them correctly, and they can even maintain a relationship of submission, submitting to the wishes of their children.

A tendency of permissive parents is to avoid drawing the attention of their children when they present bad behavior; instead, they allow such behavior.

Positive aspects of permissive families

They provide emotional support

One of the characteristics of permissive families is that they provide emotional support to their children. They generate empathy with the concerns and concerns of the children, and try to be a support in this regard.

Wanting to create the best living conditions for children can be considered a positive element, and part of this desire involves recognizing their emotions and understanding their feelings.

They take into account the aspirations of the children

Given that permissive parents want the best for their children, they place great importance on knowing their wishes, and on acting so that they can fulfill those wishes.

Permissive parents want to know the wishes and aspirations of their children, understand them and allow them to live those experiences that they so crave.

Children can have high self-esteem

Some studies have shown that children from permissive families can develop a lot of self-confidence and, therefore, high self-esteem.

Since parents turn to recognizing the feelings of their children, they grow up considering that their concerns are important, so they can have a good image of themselves.

Consequences for the children of permissive families

Selfish attitude

Permissive parents allow their children to do whatever they want, without any kind of filter. Therefore, children tend to give more importance to their own interests than to those of the people around them.

Having been raised in an environment that superimposes their wishes above those of other people, children of permissive parents learn to emphasize their own needs and act on them.

Low tolerance

Children of permissive families are used to getting what they want. Therefore, when they encounter people who think differently from them, or with situations that contradict what they think, they show very little tolerance.

In general, they show very little appreciation for other people, especially if they think differently.

Little resistance to frustration

Children of permissive parents grow up with the idea that they will always be able to achieve their goals, whatever they may be. Therefore, they tend to show very little self-control when they do not achieve a set goal.

They get frustrated very easily, they are not capable of accepting mistakes or adverse scenarios, and they end up generating conflictive situations.

Difficulty following rules

Since they have always done what they wanted, children of permissive families often have difficulty following rules.

These are people who have become used to being totally outside of any regulation. They must not be held accountable for their actions; therefore, they can do what they please.

When children of permissive parents encounter an environment that requires them to follow certain rules, such as the academic or work environment, they tend to have difficulties following the rules.

They can present violent attitudes

Sometimes, the children of permissive families end up demonstrating violently to the people around them.

Because they have little resistance to frustration and are used to having their wishes fulfilled in a sustained way, they can respond violently, as a consequence of the little self-control they usually have.

They hope someone else will solve their problems

In permissive families, children get used to not solving their own problems. Parents are totally protective, and they solve every complication that arises in the children's lives.

As a consequence of this, children often expect this attitude from everyone around them, which can generate dependent and conflictive interpersonal relationships.

References

1. "7 characteristics of permissive parents" in La Bebeteca. Retrieved on August 17, 2017 from La Bebeteca: labebeteca.com.
2. López, M. "The effects of permissive parenting" (July 27, 2012) in Family Intelligence. Retrieved on August 17, 2017 from Family Intelligence: intelligencefamiliar.com.
3. "Permissive or overprotective families" on the Bilbao City Council website. Retrieved on August 17, 2017 from the Bilbao City Council website: bilbao.eus.
4. Deward, G. "Permissive parenting" (September 2011) in Parenting Science. Retrieved on August 17, 2017 from Parenting Science: parentingscience.com.
5. Anonymous. "A letter to… All of the permissive parents today" in The Guardian. Retrieved on August 17, 2017 from The Guardian: theguardian.com.
6. Deward, G. "The permissive parenting style: Does it ever benefit kids?" (February 2014) in Parenting Science. Retrieved on August 17, 2017 from Parenting Science: parentingscience.com.