HOW TO HELP A GAMBLER: 10 EFFECTIVE TIPS - ARTE - 2025

Helping a gambler is essential for him to overcome his gambling problem and avoid its long-term negative consequences. Gambling is a mental illness classified as an addictive disorder, in which the person suffering from it feels enormous needs to play.

As with substance use, overcoming a gambling addiction is often a difficult task that requires high motivation and a lot of willpower.

What exactly is gambling?

Gambling is understood as a phenomenon that prevents a person from resisting the impulse to gamble. However, the classification of this alteration as a psychological illness has created some controversy over the last few years.

First, gambling disorder was classified as an impulse control disorder in which the person who suffers from it does not have sufficient resources to resist their impulses to gamble.

However, subsequently, a large number of investigations reformulated the foundations of this mental illness, and it was concluded that gambling constitutes an addictive disorder.

Thus, gambling is not characterized by a simple inability to control the impulse to gamble, but the person suffering from this psychological disorder develops an addiction to gambling.

In this way, gambling is similar in many ways to chemical addictions or drug addictions. While a drug addict seeks and wishes at all times the consumption of a substance for their well-being and gratification, a gambler does the same with gambling.

Therefore, gambling becomes a behavioral addiction, in which the person needs to play repeatedly to meet the gratification demands of their brain.

When a gambler deprives himself of his most precious desire, that is, gambling, he can experience sensations similar to those experienced by a drug addict when he cannot consume.

With this more than brief review of this mental disorder, we clearly see that the person who suffers from gambling is hooked on gambling, so overcoming this addiction is always going to be a very complicated task.

10 Tips to help a gambler

1. Understand their problem

The first step that we must take if we want to help a gambler to reverse his situation is to understand well what a gambling problem consists of.

As we have commented previously, gambling constitutes an addiction, a behavioral addiction, but in the end it presents few differences with respect to an addiction to substances. In this way, we must understand that a gambler is hooked on the game in the same way that a cocaine addict is hooked on cocaine.

Understanding your problem is a key element since it can be difficult for people who are not addicted to any substance or behavior to understand how someone can get so hooked on something.

However, there is little we can help a gambler if we are not able to understand what is happening to him and what role the game plays in his head.

It can seem very reprehensible to us that a person becomes addicted to gambling or some substance, creating problems both for himself and those around him. However, if we allow ourselves to be carried away by possible reproaches or recriminations towards the person who suffers from gambling, it will be very difficult for us to help him.

Therefore, it is important that we focus on the present, on the situation in which he is having to live and on the difficulties that he may present regarding the game.

2. Question without judgment

Until now we know that gambling is an addiction in which the person is forced to play to respond to their psychological demands.

However, not all gamblers present their addiction in an identical way, so we must find out how the person we want to help experiences gambling. Likewise, we must know what thoughts the gambler has about his addiction.

Do you identify gambling as pathological? Do you consider yourself addicted to gambling? Are you aware of the problems it causes you? Do you want to change your personal situation? Would you like to stop playing games and live a more organized life?

All these aspects must be identified before starting to help you, since depending on your personal situation it will be necessary to do some things or others.

It will be very different if we want to help a gambler who identifies his relationship with gambling as an addiction and who is convinced that he wants to overcome it, than if we want to help a gambler who does not even acknowledge having a gambling problem.

To do this, it is important to ask questions like the ones we have previously asked without making any value judgments beforehand. It is better for the person to respond based on their own thoughts than based on what you tell them.

For example, if a gambler denies having a problem with gambling, it will be useless for you to say yes and that he has to stop gambling, since he will continue to analyze his relationship with gambling based on his previous thoughts.

No matter how hard you insist, no gambler will stop gambling if they don't want to, just as no drug addict will stop using if they don't want to.

3. Relate gambling with problems

If we extract from the previous section that the person who suffers from gambling does not identify gambling as a problem, we must make them see it in a skillful way. As we have said before, if a gambler is not aware of having a gambling addiction, it will be useless if we tell them.

In this way, there are more effective techniques than constantly repeating to a gambler who has problems with gambling and who has to stop doing it. One of them is to relate the game you play every day with possible problems that it may have caused you.

A gambler may deny his addiction to the point of exhaustion in order to be able to continue gambling without having a pang of conscience, but it will be more difficult to avoid becoming aware of the problems caused by gambling itself.

This task can be relatively simple since pathological gambling tends to cause a large number of problems.

Wasting money, financial problems, relationship conflicts, family problems, decrease in friendships, problems with sleep, alcohol consumption, labor conflicts, decrease in performance, loss of health…

These are just a few examples of the problems gambling has most likely caused in a gambler.

Telling him about these problems that he has been suffering and relating them to the hours he has devoted to gambling is the most effective method for the gambler to become aware that his relationship with gambling may be harming him.

4. Inform them about pathological gambling

Once the gambler is able to relate his relationship with gambling to the problems that have arisen, he can begin to inform him about gambling.

At this point, the gambler will be beginning to analyze their relationship with gambling, so they are probably not so closed to the information you can provide about their situation.

However, the information must be provided with some caution, without falling into determinism or cataloging.

In the same way that we commented at the beginning, it is useless that you tell a gambler who suffers from gambling, since it must be he who discovers it so that he is aware of it and can begin to take actions to change.

Thus, it is convenient to explain what gambling is and what relationship exists between pathological gambling and addiction, in such a way that he can feel identified and begin to become aware that perhaps he is suffering from this psychological disorder.

5. Shift the focus of attention

Although a gambler may be aware that they have a gambling problem, their own addiction may lead them to deny it and interpret their problems in a different way.

In this way, you can be aware of your problems and your complicated relationship with the game, but not give the latter full responsibility for your difficulties.

"Yes, I spend a lot of money gambling but the other day I won 300 euros, so my financial problems are not caused only by gambling"

"Yes, when I come home late after having been playing I argue with my wife, but it has always been that way, she has a very strong character and always reproaches me for anything."

These two sentences can be rationalizations that a gambler makes about his situation. As we can see, in both there is a minimal acceptance that their relationship with gambling can cause problems, but in neither is a clear addiction to gambling identified.

In these situations, what we can do is change the focus of attention, in which the objective is not to abandon the game itself.

If we set goals that are relevant to the gambler, it will be easier for them to increase their motivation than if the goal itself is simply to abandon the behavior that they like to do the most.

In this way, they can be asked, "until now you have tried to improve your economy while spending money with the game and it has not worked, we are going to change the strategy by stopping playing to see if we have better results."

Using problem solving important to the gambler as an incentive to stop gambling can be an effective strategy to convince yourself to overcome your addiction.

6. Provide alternatives

When the gambler is convinced that he wants to stop gambling to improve various aspects of his life, it is important to provide him with alternatives.

People who are addicted to gambling tend to spend many hours playing, so if you want to stop playing, you will have to find other activities with which to occupy that time.

Finding activities that are incompatible with gambling such as exercising, reading, meeting friends or going for a walk are usually very suitable for the gambler to avoid gambling during the hours that he used to play.

7. Motivate him for change

It is very important to motivate the gambler to be able to stop playing. Overcoming an addiction is a very complicated task and the basis of success is based on the motivation to achieve the goals.

In this way, remembering the things you are gaining by putting gambling aside, the improvement in your quality of life and all the benefits of overcoming an addiction will be pure gasoline so that the gambler can continue resisting gambling.

Likewise, it will be important to highlight all his achievements no matter how small, give them value and encourage him to continue striving to overcome his addiction.

8. Help him avoid dangerous situations

Even if a person is very convinced and motivated to quit gambling, there may be certain situations in which it is extremely difficult to avoid gambling.

Being near places with slot machines, bingo halls, casinos, or times when you can consume alcohol will constitute dangerous situations that can incite a relapse.

In this way, you can help him make a list of "dangerous situations" and create an agenda that allows you to avoid them completely.

9. Encourage him to engage in healthy recreational activities

Gambling is usually linked to an unhealthy lifestyle, alcohol consumption, few hours for care, and disorganized life.

Thus, if the gambler manages to start a lifestyle with healthy activities such as exercising, taking care of his image or practicing a sport, the game will have it more difficult to access his day to day.

Likewise, promoting an organized life, with well-established schedules, good rest at night, a good family atmosphere and healthy eating are other important aspects to avoid relapses.

10. Provide support

Finally, it is important that during the change process you can provide the support that you need. Overcoming an addiction is a complicated task, so most likely, the gambler will live moments of stress and anguish in which they need someone to lean on.

Offer your help, don't be too harsh, try to empathize with his suffering and reach out to help him walk towards change.

References

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2. McconaghY, N., Armstrong, MS, Blaszczynski I, A. and Allcock, C. (1983): "Controlied comparison of aversive therapy and imaginal desensitization in compulsive gambling", British Journal of Psychiatry, 142, 366-372.
3. Petry, N. (2003). A comparison of treatment-seeking pathological gamblers based on preferred gambling activity. Addiction, 98, 645-655.
4. Toneatto, T. & Ladouceur, R. (2003). Treatment of pathological gambling: a critical review of the literature. Psychology of addictive behaviors, 17 (4), 284-292.
5. Villa, A., Becoña, E. and Vázquez, FL (1997). Pathological gambling with slot machines in a sample of schoolchildren in Gijón. Addictions, 9 (2), 195-208.

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