HOW TO LOVE YOURSELF: 11 PRACTICAL TIPS - ARTE - 2025

Is it possible to love yourself ? Sure you do, and in fact you should. It is not about vanity or narcissism, but about valuing yourself, accepting yourself and having a real interest in you.

In this article I will teach you how to learn to love yourself, be happy and feel good about yourself again, having good self-esteem. If you totally believe in yourself, there will be no one who is beyond your means.

In my opinion, a current problem is that the educational system and society instill a series of qualities that, according to them, they need to have to be successful. All people are educated as if they were equal and the media sells us the image that we are supposed to have to be attractive.

But that way all individuality is lost. Moreover, whoever leaves that "mass" of people considers himself someone rare, the sheep that leaves the herd. However, I believe that that is the best thing to do; not getting carried away by others, knowing our potential, empowering them and acting.

If they criticize us, it doesn't matter, because the only way they won't do it is by standing still and doing nothing.

If you then believe in yourself, in your potential and have great self-expectation, you can only grow. I repeat again; It is not superiority or arrogance, but neither is it conformism. It is about accepting yourself, valuing yourself and believing in your possibilities for growth.

How to love yourself?

1-Believe in your potential

If you don't believe in yourself, others won't. And it is given for a simple fact: if you think you can, you will act accordingly, you will get results and others will perceive it.

When you find yourself with something so normal in life as an obstacle, if you think you can overcome it, you will act and you may fail at the first try. But if you think "okay, I've failed, but I'm learning how to get over it", chances are you'll end up passing it. If, on the other hand, you think "this is too much for me," you automatically stop trying.

Do you think that Nadal, Federer, Lebron James, Cristiano Ronaldo or Messi were born the best in their sports? Of course not, and if you think about it, they have failed and lost many games, but they have also won many. The fact here is that they don't give up and keep training, which guides them to more wins. However, there are many other of your competitors who do give up and don't go as high.

In this aspect it is always important that you are aware of your thoughts. I mean that internal voice that tells you "you can", "you can't", "you are the greatest", "you are the worst"… And most people are not aware of it, because you have to make an effort to observe it, question it and finally not accept it. With the practice of mindfulness it will become easier and easier.

This is called self-efficacy and it can be defined as follows: the judgments of each individual about their capacities, from which they will organize and execute actions to achieve the desired results.

Henry Ford already said it:

An example:

Juan and Manuel prepare for the New York marathon for 6 months. But the day comes and they are unable to finish it.

Juan thinks "I'm not good for this." And Manuel thinks "if I can even though I have to train more, this has helped to know what I have to train."

Who do you think is most likely to finish the marathon next year?

2-Worry why you think of yourself, not why others think

Sometimes we worry too much about "what will they think", although they may not even think about us or care what we do.

However, have you ever wondered why you don't consider what you think of yourself as often? Well, your degree of well-being and achievements in life will depend on this question.

If you don't appreciate yourself, you will sabotage yourself. You may get something you want, but if you feel like you don't deserve it, you won't enjoy it and may even spoil it.

On the other hand, you will be looking for the approval of others, one of the great most conflictive and worst areas to feel happy.

If you value yourself:

• You will have a high self-esteem (it is inseparable).
• You will have motivation.
• You will not make absurd demands on yourself.
• You can say no whenever you want.
• You will take care of yourself, you will rest and you will feed yourself properly.
• You will always be at the same level as others.
• You will give your opinion whenever you want.

3-face the past

What you are, how you feel and do now depends on your current beliefs, not the past.

It is true that if you have had to go through circumstances in which they have made you feel bad, they have not valued you, they have insulted you or mistreated you, you will be more likely to not value yourself and therefore to have worse self-esteem.

But it is not immutable, it is not a wall that is built and cannot be torn down. To value you or not depends on now.

For example:

Antonio and Miguel have gone to war and have been mistreated, insulted and everything worse than you can imagine.

Antonio thinks that this has made him stronger and will help him fight new obstacles, now everything will seem like a trifle. Miguel, however, thinks that he is worthless and that it will affect him for the rest of his life.

Cases like these there are thousands. Two people go through the same circumstances and one collapses while another is able to emerge stronger.

The moment you think that some negative past event is going to help you become better and stronger, everything changes.

4-Accept that you are not your mistakes

Your past mistakes do not define you, what defines you is what you think and do now.

If you have made any mistake, it has already happened and it has been to learn. What's more, you will improve from it. Think that if you had not committed it, it is likely that you would not have had the opportunity to improve.

Think about how good you are and what you are achieving.

5-You have nothing to prove

Why do you have to show someone something to value you?

With that, you would make your happiness and self-esteem depend on other people.

Therefore, be happy and feel good without having anything to prove to anyone. Set goals and try to achieve them, but that your happiness is controlled by you, not by others.

6-The past and mistakes are valuable

From now on, you can start to think of your past (even if it was negative) as valuable to you and to others. Because it has allowed you to learn, be stronger and improve as a person.

When you accept this, your weaknesses become strengths and allow you to grow.

7-Make a positive difference

If you really value yourself and have positive expectations about yourself, you will automatically make a positive difference, you will be contributing well to the world.

If for example you think that you are supportive, you will help people.

If you think you are an entrepreneur and have initiative, you will start projects.

If you think you are friendly, you will be friendly to others.

8-Surround yourself with positive people who value you

Why hang out with people who don't value you when you can hang out with those who do?

Why are you with negative people with people who will make you grow?

Attitudes towards life are contagious. Although your happiness depends on yourself, "whoever gets close to a good tree, is sheltered by a good shade."

"If I have been able to see further, it has been because I have climbed on the shoulders of giants" -Isaac Newton.

9-Value your time and body

Start taking care of yourself mentally and physically, both are important.

Our thoughts are important, although taking care of our diet and exercising will also help us to have a positive self-esteem.

On the other hand, eliminate from your habits everything that is not contributing at all to your growth and happiness. TV programs? Negative friendships?

Also think about whether you have a job that you like and where you are valued. We spend a third of our lives working. Is it worth continuing in one in which you are not appreciated or that you do not like? Or is it worth taking the risk and taking advantage of your time?

10-Meditate and practice mindfulness

All of the above will allow you to expand your interests and do new things in life.

Go to new places, meet interesting people, do new things.

12-Embrace kaizen

Kaizen is the Japanese philosophy of constant improvement.

If you adopt this philosophy, your growth will be constant and will always go upwards.